Being paid for and paying for others
“You have been paid for. Each of you, Black, White, Brown, Yellow, Red —whatever pigment you use to describe yourselves — has been paid for. But for the sacrifices made by some of your ancestors, you would not be here; they have paid for you. So, when you enter a challenging situation, bring them on the stage with you; let their distant voices add timbre and strength to your words. For it is your job to pay for those who are yet to come.”
— From Dr. Maya Angelou’s book “Rainbow in the Cloud: The Wisdom and Spirit of Maya Angelou”
By Stephan Drew
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Years ago, when my brothers, sister and I were just teenagers, we spent some time working for my uncle.
He had a farm and, during the summer, we helped him put in tobacco. It didn’t pay much but that really wasn’t the point. Our parents wanted us to experience hard work.
As most Darlingtonians know, working in tobacco isn’t easy at all. The sun bears down relentlessly upon you and, between the rows of chest-high plants, there is no breeze to cool your parched skin.
The dirt is dry and, if you make too much of a stir, the dust rises and sticks to your sweat-soaked body. The gum sticks to your hands and anything you touch. The mosquitos look upon you as easy prey.
There is no air-conditioning and the water you get to drink is not always cold. All of that gets quite uncomfortable very quickly. But, as I said, my parents wanted us to have just a small taste of what they experienced daily when they were children.
My parents were born during the Depression and lived on farms until they reached adulthood. Although they still love the land, they knew there was something better and they decided to work hard and obtain that better life for their children.
However, my mother and father were not unusual in this. Parents, grandparents and great-grandparents have been doing this for centuries. Working hard, struggling and sacrificing to pass on a better quality of life to their offspring was expected of them. It was their duty, as it was the duty of their ancestors.
Every one of us has a similar story somewhere in our past. There may have been generations of wealth in your family but, somewhere down the line, they were poor, tired, and covered in dirt and sweat. And they were profoundly determined.
They were steadfast, strong-willed people … poor but proud, tired but tenacious, hungry but hardworking.
The father who works three jobs so that he can not only provide for his family but also build a better future for them. He bows his head and takes orders from a boss he may not like, just so he can make enough to send his son or daughter to college. He knows, in his mind, that he is not working just to please his employer. His true goal is to create a world where his children will never have to beg, borrow, bow or scrape for anyone.
The mother who sews, takes in washing or cooks and cleans for people to make that “little extra” so she can send her child to the city to pursue their dreams. Scrubbing their clothes and floors until her fingers bleed, she always looks haggard. She may not have had a new dress in 20 years but there is a smile on her face because she is building a real-life dream for her children.
These people and millions more like them have spent their lives struggling and sacrificing to “pay for” those of us who are here today. Yes, as Dr. Angelou said, we have been “PAID FOR.”
We owe no debt to exist here as free, dignified human beings. Our forebears paid it … in full. We need not hang our heads or feel ashamed. The lives we have now are directly due to their endeavors. We are connected, through the centuries, to those who didn’t have much at all but knew what might be achieved. You and I are precisely where we are today because of them. We are the product of all that suffering.
All these “rights” we have, THEY fought for them. The respect from others that we feel entitled to, THEY never knew that feeling. The status, courage and pride in our walk, THEY never possessed that. Many sacrificed even their dignity to get us to this point.
Their ultimate goal was to produce children that would never feel oppression, persecution, humiliation or shame. They wanted us to walk the world with our heads high and a spring in our step, not be ashamed of who or what we are. They paid our bill so we wouldn’t ever have to experience those things.
And they have done that. How well they have succeeded! It has been generations since any of us had to suffer the deep deprivations that were the daily lives of our ancestors. They have created this magical world of plenty for us.
But, although they paid our bill, that doesn’t mean we’re free to abuse the luxuries we have. These sacred rights and privileges came at great cost. Our forebears knew that what they gave us was precious and we should guard it carefully.
Not only should we never take it for granted but we should do all we can to keep it going. Since our bill was paid and our balance is “0,” it is up to us to pay the bill for future generations. Thankfully, we don’t have to suffer and struggle as much as our forebears did. However, we do have to put in some effort.
We can’t simply rest on our laurels and hope for the best. We have to do our part to make it happen. If our forebears, with all their limitations – poverty, hunger, ignorance – could see a better destiny for us, just imagine how much brighter a future we can create for our posterity.
We have it in our power to produce offspring who will never know want, hunger or humiliation. But generations to come need to know what our ancestors went through to get us here. They need to be told that everything they take for granted was won through generations of hardship and struggle. They need to know just how hard that payment was.
Our rights do not exist simply because WE were born. They were given to us by those who toiled, hungered, sweated, bled and died so that we could arrive at this point. They did a fantastic job but now, their work is done. Their energy is spent. They took the arduous journey to bring us to this amazing world we live in. They have nothing left to give us anymore … except the most important thing of all. The knowledge they gained from that journey.
All of that wisdom is in danger of being lost and we must not let that happen. We need our older generation to pass on those life lessons to the youth of today. We can tell the stories but you and I can’t truly explain it to them because WE didn’t live it.
Our grandparents did. And, if you are fortunate enough to have even one grandparent left, hold them close. Make sure your children spend some time with “Grandmama and Granddaddy” and learn how life “used to be.”
They need to know. They desperately need that information to be wholesome and complete people. And they need to know what true hard work is. They need that self-awareness. There’s an old saying: “Unless you’ve been burned, you can’t really imagine how hot the fire gets.”
That is so true. Someone can talk to you about hardship and struggle all day long. But until you’ve had some scratches and blisters of your own, you really don’t understand what they’re talking about. So, like our parents did when we were children, they should be given at least a small taste of what it’s like to work hard.
It’s up to us to help pass on the stories of that experience. Our parents and grandparents got us this far through extreme adversity. They built this world of privilege, technology and luxury for us. But, if we don’t pass on those lessons to our children, it could easily be lost.
We can’t afford to let that happen. We owe our ancestors. They paid for us. They removed the rocks and paved that dirt path into the comfortable new road that we walk upon. Now, it’s our turn to pay for generations to come.
But let’s teach them ALL the lessons they will need. Don’t sugarcoat it or short-change them one whit. They deserve to know EVERYTHING it took to get us here. We owe them the whole truth. We were paid for and they will be too. But, younger generations need to FEEL just how costly that price was.
Dr. Angelou was 100% correct when she said we have already been paid for. Make sure you explain that payment completely to your descendents. Let them walk with total dignity. Heads held high, not from arrogance or ignorance but because they walk with those great men and women of courage who brought them here. If we give them these things, when it comes their time, they too will pay for someone else. And that is exactly as it should be.
