A great man who never even thought he was great
“He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’”
— Matthew 25:45
By Stephan Drew
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As many of you may know, my father passed away on March 15th.
In February, he had a series of mini-strokes and began to deteriorate quite rapidly. By the first week of March, he was bedridden (something he would hate).
We prayed for God to end his suffering and, as He always has, God heard our prayers and granted our wish. Although I am deeply saddened and miss him terribly, it was a blessing that he didn’t linger in pain for long.
He left this Earth just the way he would have wanted to. I can honestly say he was the greatest man I’ve ever known or could ever hope to meet. But I’m sure most of you feel the same way about your fathers.
My Dad was a man of immeasurable talents. He could design, build, repair, hunt, fish, farm, cook, heal and he truly adored children. To him, the younger generation, no matter how troubled, were our only hope for the future. And he treated them as such. Spending time with his children and other youngsters was a thrill for him.
Even after he got older and couldn’t join in the fun, he would sit, watch and laugh, loving every minute of those joyous times. He never thought of himself as a “great” man, although, since he died, I have heard some others call him that.
My father was a simple man. He never “put on airs” or made himself appear better than anyone for any reason. He never looked down on others, no matter what their situation or lifestyle.
He may not have agreed with their choices but he taught me that each of us has a role to fill in life. And he taught me that each and every person we meet in life has value. He loved God, his family, this country and all of humanity, in that order.
He was in the Air Force when I was younger and we traveled around the world. For a poor boy from South Carolina, he gave his family a world-class education, filled with adventures and experiences that many can’t even imagine. He truly loved people and he enjoyed spending time with folks from all walks of life.
Daddy told me many times, “People may do bad things sometimes but that doesn’t make them bad people.” He taught me to treat all persons equally, regardless of their wealth or position.
He truly lived by Matthew 25:45. He believed that’s how we are judged by God. If we don’t help those who truly can’t help themselves then how could we dare stand before the Lord and ask for His help?
I can truly say my father helped many who might have had nothing otherwise. But he never wanted praise and he was genuinely embarrassed by compliments. He never felt he had done anything “special.” He lived his life believing that it was his duty to support his family, serve his church and community, and ease the suffering of others.
And he taught us those lessons. Doing everything in your power to give your best is not “extra,” it is expected of all of us. You don’t get praise for doing what is expected of you.
As a youngster, that used to trouble me a little. While all my friends got allowances for making their beds, cleaning their rooms, emptying the trash or mowing the yard, we didn’t. We had to do something really special to get a treat.
Don’t misunderstand me. My father loved us with all his heart and gave us priceless things that many others don’t have. But he wasn’t one of these parents who think that you should get a gold star just for getting out of bed. No, you slept in that bed and messed it up so it was your job to make it up the next morning.
Some may think that’s a bit harsh. I don’t. I am grateful for the lessons I learned at my Daddy’s side. I am thankful for the many things he taught me, not only how to do things but also how to read all types of people and interact with them.
He trained me to avoid the loud, boisterous ones. I learned that just because you have the loudest voice doesn’t mean that you have the largest brain for, if someone is always talking, they’re doing very little thinking. He taught me that silence is golden.
You don’t have to respond to everything someone says or does, especially if you disagree with them. It is often best to remain quiet to see just how someone else’s mind works or whether it works at all. Besides, if you don’t interrupt, the other person just may come to a solution on their own. And they will probably be grateful to you for being a “good listener.”
He was, in many ways, the perfect father, loving husband, devoted grandfather and great-grandfather. He will be missed by all of us and many others. But I cherish the lessons he taught me and the wonderful times I had learning about life at his side.
The knowledge I acquired in my 57 years as his son is priceless and cannot be taken away. I will always keep those lessons and all the memories sacred. I miss you, Daddy, and I love you with all my heart. I am so proud to be your son. Rest in peace, knowing that you taught us well and we should be fine.
